Week 45, 2021 - Melancholic fall

I just sent out a Postcard for the first time in many, many months, and am reflecting on why it took so much out of me to get to a sendable e-mail.

With a personal e-mail, it's fair to expect a response. With a group e-mail, it's fair to expect to be opened. With a company newsletter, it's fair to expect to be ignored or not even noticed.

With personal newsletters, it feels like there's nowhere to hide. Your text arrives in someone's inbox, probably in the chaotic Promotions tab, quivering with hope that they'll open it. Maybe even read it, and spend a few moments thinking about it. Having access to analytics amps up the pressure, as it gives one answer to the question; am I just adding to the noise?

But it's good. Good to learn to push through that discomfort.

Man, sometimes it takes you a long time to sound like yourself. - Miles Davis

I'm taking baby steps to inhabit new ways of showing up in the world, with friends new and old. It's been an emotional few weeks and I'm glad to know enough now the importance of taking space for rest and restoration.